Tag: Fatherhood

Happy Father’s Day!

Ephesians 6:4 (NIV)

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Our Verse of the Day shares some great advice for fathers regarding their relationships with their children. It is offered in the context of other types of relationships (i.e., with spouses, parents, neighbors, employers, etc.).  And I would like to review it with the New Living Translation (NLT) for added perspective: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.” Notice the slight variations on how the original words are translated. The term “exasperate” means to irritate and frustrate intensely … to the point of anger. So, fathers are admonished not to create such a provocation by their actions or their words. Then we are afforded a contrast … an alternative … to avoid creating such a situation. The adverbs “instead” or “rather” indicate a preferred alternative or substitute in place of the previous action. Paul indicates that the way to avoid provocation to anger is to raise children under the training (discipline) and instruction of (that comes from) the Lord.

As fathers, our focus in leading and parenting … how we treat our children and raise them to be loving people … must originate in the Word of God. If we do not train, discipline, teach, and instruct according to the percepts revealed to us by God the Father, our children are going to become frustrated in life to the point of resentment, bitterness, and anger. Indeed, the failure of parents to utilize the Word of God as our resource, counsel, and guide for instruction will essentially lead to profound frustration and exasperation in our children as they begin to learn the meaning and purpose of life.  This is why fathers (parents) are instructed to “direct our children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it. (Cf. Proverbs 22:6)

Deuteronomy 4:5-9 (NIV)

See, I have taught you decrees and laws as the Lord my God commanded me, so that you may follow them in the land you are entering to take possession of it. Observe them carefully, for this will show your wisdom and understanding to the nations, who will hear about all these decrees and say, “Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding people.” What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the Lord our God is near us whenever we pray to Him? And what other nation is so great as to have such righteous decrees and laws as this body of laws I am setting before you today? Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

Deuteronomy 11:16-21 (NIV)

Be careful, or you will be enticed to turn away and worship other gods and bow down to them. Then the Lord’s anger will burn against you, and He will shut up the heavens so that it will not rain and the ground will yield no produce, and you will soon perish from the good land the Lord is giving you. Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

 

Psalm 78:1-8 (NIV)

My people, hear my teaching; listen to the words of my mouth. I will open my mouth with a parable; I will utter hidden things, things from of old— things we have heard and known, things our ancestors have told us. We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done. He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which He commanded our ancestors to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget His deeds but would keep His commands. They would not be like their ancestors— a stubborn and rebellious generation, whose hearts were not loyal to God, whose spirits were not faithful to Him.

Fellow fathers and men, we have a responsibility to raise our children in the training and instruction of the Lord. It is a distinct assignment given to us by Father God: to be spiritual priests over our homes! Yes, we are to be providers. Yes, we are to be protectors. And, yes, we are to be priests over our children. And it follows that if we desire to obey and fulfill our roles, we must know and follow the teaching of the Lord for ourselves. For how can we teach the Bible to our children if we ourselves do not read it and understand what it instructs? And further, how can we train our children to live in faith if we ourselves to do not walk by the Spirit in truth before them? It is said that actions speak louder than our words, so we must realize that how we conduct ourselves must be consistent with what we profess to believe. Indeed, our children will know us by the fruit we produce … Kingdom fruit that will last and glorify our Father in heaven. Amen.

So Now You Know…

Have a Blessed Day!

Proverbs 22:6 (Self-Amplified)

Train up a child … yes train up all of your children … in the way they should go … the right way … in the Way, the Truth, and the Life (Cf. John 14:6); because even when they become old, they will not depart from their training … they will not stray beyond reach from the instruction you instill in them while children. It will continue to resonate within their hearts. It will continue bring conviction to their inner beings. They will be restless when they do not live according to the Truth. They will come to see the Light of God and His wisdom in Jesus Christ. Yes, do not neglect to teach your children … be diligent to disciple them and to instruct them in the Word of God. For God has declared that His Word that goes forth shall not return to Him void; rather, it shall accomplish what He desires … what pleases Him. It shall prosper in the thing for which He sent it. (Cf. Isaiah 55:11)

A Father to the Fatherless…

Psalm 68:4-5 (NIV)

Sing to God, sing in praise of His name, extol Him who rides on the clouds; rejoice before Him—His name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling.

Our Verse of the Day caught my eye. I had been reading Psalm 37 today, but as I read Psalm 68, a theme began to emerge that I believe is a word for us today: “The Protection and the Justice of God”.

Track along with me for a few verses:

Psalm 37:1-9 (NIV)

Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land.

Psalm 68:1-6 (NIV)

Let God arise, Let His enemies be scattered; may His foes flee before Him. May you blow them away like smoke— as wax melts before the fire, may the wicked perish before God. But may the righteous be glad and rejoice before God; may they be happy and joyful. Sing to God, sing in praise of His name, praise Him who rides on the clouds; rejoice before Him—His name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. God makes a home for those who are lonely; He leads out those who are captive into prosperity; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land….

I encourage you to read both of these Psalms today … and let them speak to your heart. Let the Word of God assure you that Father God is still on the throne! Yes, and He will forever be the power and strength of His people … our Great Defender! God knows both the wicked and the righteous! He knows their end from the beginning! So, I encourage us to remember these following words and to trust our Heavenly Father:

Psalm 139:13-18 (NIV)

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful; I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How amazing are your thoughts concerning me, God! How vast is the sum of them! If I were to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand; when I awake, I am still with you.

My friends, God knows each one of us intimately … and He invites each one of us to know Him intimately. As we come to know our Heavenly Father, as we learn to trust Him in all things that concern us, anytime is a great time and opportunity to pause and give thanks to God. In these Psalms, we are afforded many reasons to worship Him. One of these is that He is a father to the fatherless.  And although I did not experience fatherlessness growing up, I have observed how the absence of an earthly father in the life of a child brings challenges to their spiritual development and impacts their psychological health.

Despite any hardships you might have faced, God has affirmed in His Word that He is ever present and available to us! Though we might have never known our earthly father … though we might have been abandoned by our earthly father … though we might have been mistreated or abused by our earthly father; our Father in Heaven can be known. He has revealed Himself through His Son, Jesus Christ! God is full of compassion; and you can rejoice because He will never leave you nor forsake you! Yes, He will ever comfort you and have compassion upon you no matter what you experience in this life! God the Father is all we need to be whole and to grow into the son or daughter He designed us to be. For, indeed, we are created in His image. We are ordained to be His image bearers. And so, He is worthy of all reverence and adoration….

So Now You Know…

Have a Blessed Day!

As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him; for He knows how we are formed, He remembers that we are dust. ~ Psalm 103:13-14

The Joy of Fatherhood…

Proverbs 23:24 (NIV)

The father of a righteous child has great joy; a man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him.

Our Verse of the Day presents a thought that resonates so deeply with me. Indeed, the father of a righteous child has great joy! Indeed, a man who fathers a wise son (or daughter) rejoices in him (or her)!  Righteous. Wise. Faithful. These are the qualities I believe every father desires to instill in his children. What could possibly matter more to a man than to see his children living in the light of the Truth? As the Apostle John exclaimed: “It gave me great joy when some believers came and testified about your faithfulness to the truth, telling me how you continue to walk in it. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” (Cf. 3 John 3-4)

When I contemplate my own life, and the legacy I hope to leave my children, I pray the most important “take away” they will receive from me will be a legacy of faith in Jesus Christ.  I have found that nothing else truly matters in this life except our fellowship with God and our love for Him … and accordingly, our sincere love for one another. Leading our children to faith in Jesus Christ and discipling them in the faith is the greatest demonstration of real love that I could ever imagine to impart. Why?  Because I know they will not have or experience abundant life or fulfilling love apart from Him.  If we love and cherish children as God ordained for men to do, then it follows that we must bestow upon them the best gift possible … the love of God through His Son … the only hope of eternal life!

I am sure that most of us have sometimes failed to be consistent in our own journeys of faith over the years … and our examples have not always been the best in difficult situations or personal challenges.  But in whatever way we have fallen short of being God’s best for the building of our children’s faith, know it is never too late to redeem the time or to express a sincere desire to continue the walk together going forward.  And so, do not hesitate to humble yourself and ask your children to look beyond the sins … the missteps and mistakes made along the way … and assure them that you have endeavored and will always strive to love each of them as you have been loved by God through His Son.  Yes, remind them that God is their true Father … and that His love is perfect, full of grace, and abides forever.

As we approach the celebration of Father’s Day this upcoming Sunday, I think it is wonderful that we will receive some verses that focus on the roles of fathers and the experience of fatherhood.  Though we who have become human fathers are quite imperfect, the purpose for which God created us is to reflect His unique and holy relationship with His children.  He is our Provider, our Protector, and our Priest! And these are the roles that God ordained for men since He formed Adam.

My friends, if we look at the disorder and evil within the world today, so much of it can be traced to the lack of fathers in the home … the lack of fathers not fulfilling their God ordained roles in their homes.  Not only does this rebellion against God affect the lives of their children, it impacts the wellbeing of our communities and our nation. So, I want to encourage every father (and mother, too) who is praying for their children who have wandered from the faith. I pray you will persevere in prayer before our Heavenly Father. For though the spiritual battle is intense, the battle belongs to Lord! It is His victory! Indeed, God expects us to fulfill our roles as we are led by His Word under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I encourage you to ask for the “veil” to be removed from your child’s eyes … that they too might see the light of God in Christ Jesus. (Cf. 2 Corinthians 4:4) Yes, continue to watch and pray without ceasing! And I pray that I will be celebrating your victories with you soon as well…. Amen!

So Now You Know…

Have a Blessed Day!

As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him; for He knows how we are formed, He remembers that we are dust. ~ Psalm 103:13-14

Responsible Fatherhood….

Ephesians 6:4 (NIV)

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

The role of a father with his children an serves an integral part of their development and well-being throughout their lives as they grow and mature.  For those of us who have become fathers, the Scriptures afford us with points of wisdom to guide us in this role.  And I believe, fathers, we need to spend time in the Word of God to see what our Heavenly Father has to say about the role He ordained for men to fulfill in His creation.  Sure, we have our own fathers as examples … and the fathers of other people as examples.  And as hard as they might endeavor to be the “best” father, we realize that each one will miss the mark at times because we are fallen creatures.  Still, that is the most tangible resource men becoming fathers will have to work with as we hone and prepare our hearts for this service to God … often learning what “not to do” as well as “what to do” from the role models we had in our lives.  So, again, when all else fails (I hear my wife now), men need to read the directions that our perfect Father has provided to guide us on this journey into fatherhood.  I believe the more we attempt to implement what God has revealed to us, the better fathers we will ultimately be in service to His Kingdom and for the children He has called to salvation through our roles as earthly fathers….  With this preface in mind, we will look at our Verse of the Day and put it into the relational contexts in which Paul shares this admonition:

Ephesians 6:1-4 (NRSV)

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—this is the first commandment with a promise: 3 “so that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”

4 And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Notice how Paul begins the discourse with a covenant context – the fifth commandment found in Exodus 20:12,  “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.”  I will mention that this is the first commandment that is not focused in reference to our relationship with God; rather, it initiates the remaining six commandments which deal with our relationships with other people. Is it not awesome that the first commandment for human relationships is connected to the first relationships we have after birth … with our fathers and mothers? In other words, I believe the context and order of the commandments indicates the importance of this human relationship above all others … the one we are born into as we enter the world.

So, to me, Paul’s commentary points out a concern that greatly impacts the ability and willingness of us to observe this particular commandment; namely, the leadership role of fathers in the development of a covenant relationship with their children.  We are to bring our children up (raise them) in the discipline (teaching) and instruction of the Lord.  This is an imperative upon us to do so, along with our wives, as the spiritual leaders of our homes!  If we are not actively, intentionally pouring the Word of God into our children’s hearts, then we are not fulfilling a key function of our roles as fathers.  I might even refer to this as the “office” of fathers.  For it is clear from the Scripture that we have been given the “authority” and “responsibility” to fulfill what God has commanded us to do as fathers.  How do you think children will honor their fathers and mothers if they do not take the lead in creating the bonds that foster honor and instill the concept of obedience?

Another observation of this verse, it that the text implies that our children will be “provoked to anger.”  Some translations render the phrase “do not exacerbate or frustrate” your children.  So what does this mean?  Well, to me, it means that children desire and need “boundaries” for their lives.  There is something innate within each of us that “knows” good and evil … right and wrong … pleasing and displeasing.  Is it not very frustrating and exacerbating to have a relationship with someone but to not know the expectations for that relationship?  For example, employers hire (enter relationship with) people to accomplish a greater good that can only be achieved through the pooling of talents and teamwork. Yet, how difficult is it to be an effective employee if you are not told what to do or given a clear assignment within the team? Yes, it is responsibility of fathers to teach and train their children the “parameters” for functioning not only within the family but within the human community as well. So God instructs us as fathers to be actively, spiritually engaged with our children because the failure to do so will leave them exacerbated, frustrated, in confusion, and eventually abandoning the guidance of moral conduct God has given us in His commandments.  Indeed, if fathers do not commit to take the lead role in the assimilation of their children into the family of God, they will become quite frustrated and angry over time.

This leads me to an often-quoted verse – because its truth is timeless and proven:

Proverbs 22:5:6 (Self-Amplified)

Train up a child … yes train up all of your children … in the way they should go … the right way … in the Way, the Truth, and the Life (Cf. John 14:6); because even when they become old, they will not depart from their training … they will not stray beyond reach from the instruction you instill in them while children.  It will continue to resonate within their hearts.  It will continue bring conviction to their inner beings.  They will be restless when they do not live according to the Truth.  They will come to see the Light of God and His wisdom.  Yes, do not neglect to teach your children … be diligent to disciple them and to instruct them in the Word of God.  For God has declared that His Word that goes forth shall not return to Him void; rather, it shall accomplish what He desires … what pleases Him.  It shall prosper in the thing for which He sent it. (Cf. Isaiah 55:11)

To you who are fathers (and to men who will become fathers), your role and mine … a distinct assignment given to us by Father God … is to be spiritual priests over our homes! Yes, we are to be providers.  Yes, we are to be protectors.  And, yes, we are to be priests over our children.  We are given this charge to bring them up in the training, admonition, and instruction of the Lord as revealed through His Word.  To neglect this role, to be disobedient to this charge, will leave your children frustrated and exacerbated with trying to understand who they are … not only in relation to you but with their Heavenly Father as well.  So I urge you to take these Scriptures to heart … to put them into practice.  As Jesus taught, “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the Rock. (Cf. Matthew 7:24) So, I pray we will all be wise men … and do what the Lord has commissioned us to do in our roles as fathers….

So Now You Know….

Have a Blessed Day!